then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
