You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
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