Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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