I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
