I was born with a shot glass in my hand
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
