Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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