If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
tonight lets celebrate not being married
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
