So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
