you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
no you cant smoke seaweed
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
