yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Randomize