Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Randomize