After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
