if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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