it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize