Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
