hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
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