I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
