oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
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