Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize
