Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Randomize
