My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
