margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
