your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize