forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
