your thong is hanging out like whoa
Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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