I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I know her cup size but not her name....
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
