he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
