can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
