Please, let me fuck your mom
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Randomize
