I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
