It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize