You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
