your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize
