hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
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