she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
