I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize