you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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