my text book just quoted the cookie monster
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
