season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
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