Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Randomize
