yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
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