Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
