Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
My bed smells like the plague
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
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