is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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