We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
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