Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
