Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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