Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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