I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
