I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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