I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Just high enough for therapy.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
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