She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
We had to coat check the pizza.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
